Brangelina to Get Married For the Kids!

At long, long last, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie have decided to tie the knot, at least according to the venerable celebrity gossip scribes at OK! Weekly.

Sure, there's not a snowball's chance in hell this is happening, but why let mere fact thwart a good story paired with a romantic-looking stock photo?
Certainly no reason we can think of here at The Hollywood Gossip.

The reason for Brangelina's (fake) change of heart? SIX reasons!

Because it would "mean the world" to Maddox, Zahara, Pax, Vivienne, Knox and Shiloh and the new baby she's perpetually pregnant with, that's why!

The children, a source hilariously says, have been wanting a wedding since they’ve been old enough to understand their parents are not officially married.

We're sure this plunges Knox into a state of emotional despair every night. She supposedly loves when babies cry ... maybe they figure this will help?

“First it was Maddox, who has begged his parents to tie the knot for years,” the insider says. “Lately, Shiloh and Zahara have been chiming in, too."

Not only that, but "Pax thinks it would be the coolest to be a ring bearer.”

It totally would. We just hope Suri Cruise, Sean Preston and Jayden James Federline are invited to fill out the bridal party. Best. Fake. Wedding. Ever.